"If men define situations as real, they are real in their consequences" W. I. Thomas and D. S. Thomas.
So, some eternal questions that I hear or read about: Why does league play differ from tournament play, which differs from open play in bowling? Why does the good shots seem to come so easily during practice versus when the proverbial 'lights are on'? For the strokers, why does the crankers seem to have all the area for striking, and any slight miss right or left leaves something on the back row for you? For the crankers, why does it always seem that the people who pump their ball right up five seem to have such great carry, whereas you miss just slightly and it's either a strike or a split - nothing in between? Why does the ball I need for tonight's look always seem to be at home as opposed to being in my bag? Any other day I could hit my mark blindfolded, why can I not get within 10 boards of my mark tonight?
Perception is 100% of the mental game of bowling - and no skill within bowling is more challenging to train and develop. Equipment changes are easy - expensive sometimes, but easy. It can mean buying a new ball, a new drilling for a ball, a surface change, a bit of polish, or just switch balls to one that works a bit better for what you happen to see at that time. Technique changes are not quite as easy, but are observable, able to be caught on video, and a game plan can be developed to change release points, swing planes, amount of rotation, amount of revolutions, and speed of the delivery. There are even full on discussions about how to tackle oil patterns based on ball covers, drillings, ball speed, axis of rotation, and what moves to make based on the breakdown of the pattern. Mental changes and perception changes are usually far more difficult to change, because they can hinge on so many non-bowling factors.
So, it's league night, or the day of the tournament, and you've got your equipment - you've practiced, and you're as ready as you're ever going to be. But are you really mentally there and ready? Do you normally see the positive in a situation, or is your life a shining example of pessimism? Have you put aside the traffic issues you had to endure in getting to the bowling center? How about the various situations at work that keep nagging at your attitude? The conversations that centered around how certain people in your life aren't living up to your expectations? Does one chance break that doesn't go your way keep lingering in the back of your mind? When you were in this situation before (whatever the situation is), how did you perform, and are you expecting a repeat of that performance?
Perhaps the biggest alteration in your game doesn't need to be a change in balls, or a change in speed, but a change in attitude and perception. I've heard it called over-thinking the game, under-thinking the game, caving under pressure, brain seizures, or the slow spiral into the toilet. Usually the bowler has the tools they need physically and their technique (if they practice) is correct - they may just need to either make minor adjustments or acknowledge that an errant shot was an errant shot - and move on. However, that's where the mental game comes in - do they have the ability to make that adjustment, or put what happened behind them and be fresh the next time they step up on the approach?
Let's look back at the quote: "If men define situations as real, they are real in their consequences". There are other variations on that theme -- "the second you consider yourself defeated - you will be". "Once you've been taken out of the moment, you've been taken out of the game." How about "if you're stuck in focusing on the past, you can't focus on the present." All very easy to say, and all make sense - but putting them into practice is what separates the good bowler from the outstanding bowler. Personal distractions, bowling and non-bowling frustrations, perfectionism -- all elements that if they cannot be mentally set aside - will create inconsistencies and normally preventable mistakes.
Let me illustrate with a personal example from last week. Now, as I've said in prior posts, I practice on Friday mornings, but since the kids are out of school now and have been asking to go bowling with daddy, we made it a family affair this past Friday. Now the kids are both under the age of 7, and even though they've been bowling at various birthday parties that their friends have invited them to - they really haven't been bowling without the bumpers and ramps that the parties usually provide. Now it's my fault that I apparently wasn't clear, because I asked for two single lanes next to each other, where I would put my wife and kids on one lane with the bumpers, and I'd take the other lane for my normal practice. However, I wound up with a crossing pair, so no bumpers. Also I can usually get a couple of lanes with a buffer lane or two between myself and other bowling groups - especially needed since I have little ones that I was going to be working with. Unfortunately that wasn't in the cards either - the center was a bit too busy to allow for that on both sides of us. Which is good for the center, but I was constantly having to be mindful of other bowlers who were trying to enjoy their time.
So, to recap - bowling center is the same, but the scenario is different. I've got new pressures in that I want my kids to enjoy the experience, I want to be able to practice normally, I've got to keep an eye on the kids to make sure they don't get in anyone else's way, and getting a bit isolated so that our family's impact on other bowlers is not an option.
Now, once we start bowling, the kids are not dealing well with there being no bumpers, and due to the age - they get frustrated easily and are quite vocal about it. My home center doesn't have in-channel bumpers that they can just raise up - they actually have a bumper that has to be put into the channel - and would have had to cross 6 other lanes to get them into our lanes, which is why I didn't ask for them for even one lane. My thought process also went that we play with the balls in the basement, hopefully that would translate well into the actual bowling alley. Turns out I thought wrong, and the kids were doing everything except what I was showing them. When they weren't making it even thirty feet before going in the channel, they got a real case of defeatism and then the real vocal commentary began of "I can't do this, I'll never be good". Normally I deal with other people's children very well, and my patience is quite long. However, with my own kids - my blood pressure escalated quickly - especially with those words of defeatism. They, between the two of them, managed to bowl one complete game, but I had to bowl the rest of the frames while my wife took them to the snack area. Every shot became more and more of a "just throw it and let's get this over with," instead of stopping, and resetting my focus so I could maintain my emotional and mental balance. Because I couldn't move past the distractions, errant shots became the norm, which added to the frustration level.
I have to chalk that experience up to not being a bowling practice session, but an example about how far I have to go with my mental game and being able to set aside distractions to focus on one shot at a time, every shot. I couldn't do that, and because of my not being able to overcome those distractions - I didn't enjoy my time bowling, and I didn't feel like it was a good family time outing. I didn't feel like the practice was technically productive, and I was just ready to get my family out of there so I could interact with them without bowling being involved. Will I take them bowling again - of course I will. They've got growing and maturing to do, and apparently so do I. But hopefully we will have this sport to share for a long time to come, and I'll take each opportunity to check my mental fortitude, because if I don't move past Friday's outing - I may become subject to the Thomas Theorem in the negative - where I expect there to be problems before we even get started.
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